Sometimes

Happy Holidays! I’m listening to my cynical Xmas playlist today, and thought I’d do something I almost never do: post a video from YouTube.

Enjoy “Sometimes You Have To Work On Christmas (Sometimes)” from my favorite Seattle band, the awesome Harvey Danger!

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TdMAkdu1dxM]

Happy Festivus

The following post was written over two years ago. I didn’t post it right away, however. Couldn’t decide if I wanted to share it or not. But after a week of thinking about it, I realized that there really is no reason not to, as an early Christmas present to my co-conspirator. Enjoy.

She was early, but that was because she’d left her running clothes at her boyfriend’s that morning and had to buy new running clothes to go running with me (she claimed).

We were originally going to run in Forest Park, but she said she hadn’t brought her trail running shoes and didn’t want to get her regular running shoes muddy, so we knocked around some ideas and ended up (much to my surprise) deciding on a route in my neighborhood. I was cautious because it seemed so easy to talk her into it… but on a practical note it was fine with me, because then I would be close to home.

We ran, I kept the pace, had a good time, joking and talking the whole time. Got back to my apartment and I was starving, she agreed to get some dinner (she didn’t have the girls that night so didn’t have to hurry back home)… we walked to a place in my ‘hood (a really really good Italian place, in fact one of our first dates over a year ago), split a bottle of wine between the two of us.

Again, like I said before, it was almost BETTER than when we were first dating, before the bad times, before the multiple breakups, before the angry email exchanges… I wasn’t trying to flirt, I was just enjoying myself, and she seemed to, too. We laughed and had a great time, plus had our shared history, were comfortable with each other. I really am getting the best that she has to offer. At one point (later on), I even told her this; let her current boyfriend deal with the demands, the PMS, the fears… I’m happy with just this. Yeah, I’m weird.

So, after telling her about running on the beach, she mentioned that she’s never run on the beach, with the exception of the very end of the Hood-to-Coast. So I said, “Let’s go to the beach RIGHT NOW! You have a car, you don’t have the girls, Seaside is just over an hour away… what’s stopping us?” And beyond her two objections, one, that she had an 8:30 AM meeting the next morning (“We have plenty of time for you to make that!” I declared) and two, that she had to let Mojo (her dog) out… yeah, beyond that, she was up for the idea.

So, we did. By 10:15 PM, we were in Cannon Beach. We got a couple of cups of coffee, then took a six-pack of Fat Tire and a two-thirds full bottle of Sauza Commemorativo I’d brought along on to the beach, sat, and flirted a bit, and laughed, and got really drunk, and confessed that we’re still really attracted to each other, and I realized that no matter what, this night will join all my other really great memories.

She told me, just after I’d brought up the idea of going to the beach and just before she’d given in, “I don’t remember you being this impulsive.” To which I replied, “Yeah, I’ve changed a little… OK, maybe a lot.”

And the bestbestbest part is that I didn’t do anything I have to feel guilty about. Her… maybe a little guilt, but not anything major.

Belief without evidence must be questioned

If it’s OK to dismiss belief in the Easter Bunny as unserious…

…why is it not OK to dismiss belief in God?

Why is one of those considered a taboo to question, and the other is not?

There’s just as much, if not more, evidence for the existence of the Easter Bunny than there is for God.

Why is it OK to teach children that it’s OK to believe in something without any evidence or even an unexplained effect… but only as it relates to Bronze Age beliefs?

Sorry if this seems out of context

The following was written in response to a debate between myself and PAgent over on the Portland Metroblog, about the anti-fur protesters and Schumacher Furs, and the recent developments that seem to have Schumacher Furs moving out of their downtown location – news at 11:00.

I’ve also jumped into the discussion at Loaded Orygun, and at The Mercury’s Blogtown… though not so much over at Jack Bog’s place, since he appears to see any dissent from his angry-old-man routine to be “hate speech” invoking bannination. Heh.

Here’s my response to PAgent:

Thanks for the debate. I appreciate it very much and am glad for the opportunity.

That being said… This boils down to two points, as I see it. First, you seem unaware of what the publicly stated aims of the protesters are, which means you’re arguing what you believe their motives are, rather than going by what they’ve said. And you seem intent on enforcing some code of how and where protests should be conducted – “public debate is what happens in newspapers, or in city council meetings”. Luckily, free speech is more broadly protected than that.

To the first point, I’m including some links at the end of this comment. There are plenty more; this has been a widely reported topic in the local media. I’m sure I’ve missed some, but I’d like to draw your attention to the first link. One of the protesters, Matt Rossell, had an editorial published in the Portland Tribune back in March – have you read it? In it, and in other articles in the local media, he specifically said that the goal of his group is education; education about how the furs are obtained and from where (China, from what I understand).

He specifically denies that they are trying to “shut down” Schumacher Furs: “With protests originally scheduled to last only through Christmas, In Defense of Animals’ objective always has been to educate people about the inherent cruelty of the fur industry, not to put Schumacher out of business.
The strategy is simple: Portlanders are compassionate, and most will make humane consumer choices when given accurate information.”

One thing I’ve learned in my reading that I will admit I didn’t know before is that there have been arrests during the protests, and that there have been some vandalism. That being the case, it seems that the protesters spokesperson acknowledges that the aim is peaceful, and that those who have broken the law have had to face the consequences of their actions. That sounds about right to me, and stands in contrast to Gregg Schumacher’s claim of death threats against him. If there were credible death threats, then I imagine that law enforcement has been involved. I haven’t seen any reports of that.

And the claims of death threats against the business, which appear baseless, stand in contrast to the actual death threats the Schumachers’ posted in their windows. How we deal with those who disagree with us is a reflection of who we are. In my view, it was not a mature response, and was actually dismissive of the protesters. It was not on the same level as the signs and protests I’ve seen deployed and documented in videos.

And, yes, I do consider this a public debate. In what way is it not? In fact, Rossell has said that there were steps that the Schumachers could take that would satisfy the protesters and end the demonstrations. I haven’t seen what Rossell thinks those steps would be, but I’d guess that it would be some form of acknowledgment of where and how the furs are harvested – assuming that they were seeking education and not shutting down the business. I admit that this is speculation on my part, and I think I’ll try to track down Rossell and put the question to him myself. I’ll happily report what information I can get.

Sadly, I don’t have to look very hard for bigotry, but you’re right, it’s everywhere. I’m sure I show evidence of it myself, which is why I’m grateful for friends (and others) who can call me on it when I show it. I welcome that kind of criticism. It doesn’t appear the Schumachers share my openness to criticism.

To your last argument: even if I accept your unfounded premise that the aim of the protests was to “shut down” the Schumachers, and even if I also accept your premise that the Schumachers business may be harmed by moving to the ‘burbs (if the downtown is as scary for their customers as they claim, the counter-argument could be made that the lower rents, better parking, and proximity to their customer base could actually HELP their business, not hurt it), there’s still this fear underlying what you say. Is it so scary to have someone disagree with you? Even if they disagree on a weekly basis, loudly and as often as possible?

It doesn’t matter if I agree with the speech of others. If their speech is hateful, I want everyone to hear it, because I think that rational people can recognize hateful speech when they see it. I don’t fear the vocal minority. I want to protect it.

An example of my personal hero is Richard Dreyfuss, the actor. During the filming of “Close Encounters of the Third Kind”, when it was being filmed in Mobile, Alabama, there was a group of Klansmen that wanted to march in a parade. There were many who opposed the Klansmen marching; they wanted to silence them. Mr. Dreyfuss actually demonstrated in favor of letting them march, on the same basis that I myself said: all speech is protected, and (pardon this analogy, I can’t help it) give your opponents enough rope to hang themselves. If their underlying nature is bigoted, they will show that side of themselves sooner or later.

I may have the details wrong on that story; I read it long ago, and the underlying premise stuck with me. It may be a myth that I use to support my beliefs, but even if the actual story is different I think the value I got from it is a good one.

I would support the peaceful protest of any topic in the public sphere, even if I do not, myself, support their view. If someone was trying to “shut down” a business that I supported, if I wanted to take part, I would encourage communication between the two parties, and do my part to make sure both sides understand their responsibilities in engaging the public. I applauded Randy Leonard in trying to mediate in this case, and I think the evidence is clear that it was the business owners who were beyond help, not the protesters.

Abortion clinics, fur stores, gay/lesbian bookstores, whatever – none of them have a right to exist, free from criticism, regardless of whether I believe in their rightness or wrongness. Someone’s always going to disagree with you. The best response is to engage them and learn from them. And if they appear to have all the power and you don’t, then you might have to take the debate outside of city councils or newspaper editorial pages, places that seem stacked in favor of the ones with money and power. Especially if you’re young and idealistic and don’t have a lot of cash on hand.

Links mentioned above:

Matt Rossell’s editorial in the Portland Tribune

The website of the Portland anti-fur protesters

Defining “obscure”

Remember “A Scanner Darkly”?

It’s OK if you remember the movie, instead of the book, because Linklater’s movie adaptation was about as faithful to the Philip K. Dick novel as any movie could be.

The reason I ask, and the event I’m referencing, is when I drove up to Seattle to see the film. Longtime readers may remember this.

Not obscure enough? Well, let me get closer to the real reason I’m bringing this up. Via Boing Boing, I’ve learned that Jonathon Lethem, an author whose topics are very much like PKD’s, is going to be doing commentary on the DVD release of “A Scanner Darkly”.

Which brings me to the origin of this post: reading that Mr. Lethem is going to be offering commentary on PKD’s work actually made me gasp out loud.

Infiltration

The dream:

I’m encased in hardened battle armor, from my head to my feet, strong thick slabs of metal, and the outside is be-weaponed with lasers, slug-throwers, grapples. I’m floating just above the surface of a dead planet, shades of gray. In my sights, separated from me by the inky-black airless vacuum, is an alien, also protected by its own battle armor, also in shades of gray and black, and also studded with weapons of all kinds, low- and high-tech. The alien is a cylinder shape, no legs, tapered on the bottom, and rounded on top, with triangle-shaped eye-slits and pointy sensors on top of its rounded head. It’s buzzing menacingly.

It’s closing in, and I feel claustrophobic inside my armor. The alien shoots at me, a tangle-cord, and it wraps around my chest armor and squeeeeeezes me. It actually is stronger than my armor! The ropes constrict and begin crushing my armor against me. I’m trapped! I’m frantically firing off lasers, trying to cut the alien into shreds; they seem to hit, to score its armor, but the alien just laughs it off and keeps closing, reeling in the ropes and crushing me, closer, closer, can’t… breathe! The buzzing gets louder and louder…

The Awakening:

Smacky is laying on top of the covers, right next to me, causing them to wrap tightly around me, pinning me under them. His face is right in front of mine. He’s purring loudly, and trying to tuck his head into the nape of my neck. “Ack! Get off of me!” I cry, and I fling the covers back and grab Smacky and put him out in the hall and close my bedroom door and go back to dreamless sleep.

Yes

Tracy asks:

“Are you ever going to blob again?”

Short answer: Yes.

Slightly less short answer: Yes, when I think of something to blob about. I did change the POTW, though. Nice, eh?

87.34% snark-free thanks

  • Thanks to my family for reminding me where I come from and for always feeling like “home”.
  • Thanks to my sister’s in-laws for never even noticing that there’s a distinction.
  • Thanks to my friends for being the most honest, straight-forward, and ethical people I know. Plus, you’re all hilarious. Have I mentioned that lately?
  • Thanks to my coworkers for always trying to just fix it.
  • Thanks to Smacky for being about as “cat” as anyone can be.
  • Thanks to Apple for making such sexy sexy hardware and software.
  • Thanks to my negative voice. Without you I wouldn’t have a challenge to overcome.
  • Thanks to the netroots for finally becoming a progressive, political force.
  • Thanks to everyone who voted Democratic in the last election. I was so scared that… shudder… well, let’s not think about that.
  • Thanks to redheaded women, everywhere. Just thanks. Damn. Yes, even the crazy ones. Especially them.
  • Thanks to Brooks running shoes for making the perfect shoes for my feet.
  • Thanks to the framers of the Oregon Constitution for all the free speech protections. I appreciate and use them almost every day.
  • Thanks to the New Atheists, like Daniel Dennett and Richard Dawkins and James Randi. It may take another 500 years but ours will be the majority view someday. Or we’ll be dead and unable to care.
  • Thanks to the Iron Horse, Maya’s Tacqueria, Backspace, Twin Paradox, the Limelight, the Acropolis. It’s not just the food that keeps me coming back, although that’s excellent, too.
  • Thanks to all my favorite living authors, too many to mention, but here’s a few: Tim Powers, Bruce Sterling, Carl Hiaasen, Arthur Nersesian, Neil Gaiman… the list goes on and on and deserves it’s own post, if not it’s own site (but www.bookslut.com is already taken). You inspire me, amaze me, and fill me with envy and I would read every word you write. Fuck that – I would pay for every word you write.
  • Thanks to God, for not existing or showing any evidence of ever having existed, in spite of everyone looking for You. You’ve got everyone fooled, and boy, is everyone going to feel silly when they realize You’re not there. Then we’ll all have a good laugh and finally get around to that whole “world peace and love” thing people have been promising for centuries.
  • Last, but not least, thanks to each and every one of you who reads this, or anything else I’ve ever written. I do it for myself because I’m a selfish bastard, and I’m still amazed that anyone else even understands it, let alone enjoys it and wants more. I wouldn’t stop even if I could.

…I’m sure I’m missing people. I’m sure there are people out there who would prefer a specific mention rather than being included in a broad category. I’m sure that I will think of much much better/funnier things to say immediately after clicking “Publish Post”.

But I’m also sure that you’ll understand. Happy Thanksgiving.

Shifting perspective

Walking in to work one morning with Tracy, another group of employees were heading out. One of them is a lady I’ll call H. H and her co-workers were in charge of a county work group – people working off minor crimes and misdemeanors through community service work. As such, H was dressed in grungy work clothes; baggy jeans, old boots, a sweater, down vest, hair tucked up under a baseball cap, everything looking worn out and dirty from use.

I’d talked to her before on a normal, “I’m here to fix your computer” basis, but before she started with the work crews, so I was used to her wearing business casual clothing, very conservative business casual clothing. In fact, H struck me as conservative in personality, friendly but mostly quiet and polite and practical.

Even that morning, seeing her in completely different clothes, after I had the shock of recognition, I didn’t see her as anything other than a co-worker whose computer I’d fixed from time to time. She recognized me and said “Oh, hi, Brian” and I said good morning back to her.

Tracy asked me about her, later, and after my memory had been jogged (it was eight hours later when Tracy had asked) I told her.

Tracy mentioned that H, even in no makeup, struck her as very beautiful. Tracy mentioned a resemblance to Jennifer Garner.

I gave Tracy a look, because, as I said above, I had never seen that in H at all. H was older than Ms. Garner, for one reason, and there’s a mental space that movie stars occupy that’s separate from the space everyday people occupy, which is why it’s difficult sometimes to recognize a star encountered unexpectedly on the street (have I ever told you the story about flirting with Heather Locklear?) As Tracy’s thought percolated my mind, however, I could feel my perspective shifting a little bit. Remembering H in the previous setting and clothing I knew her from, I joked, “She could probably pull off the ‘sexy librarian’ look!” Tracy agreed whole-heartedly. But eventually I shrugged it off.

The next night I had a dream about H. An intimate one. It startled me. I laughed about it the next day with Tracy, who offered me a high-five in return.

“Right! ON!” she said.

Later that day, I was leaving the county motor pool and I saw H again. She was crossing the street heading in to the parking lot. She was dressed similarly (or exactly; the clothes are so generic I couldn’t tell the difference). As she walked, her back to me, I noticed that her hair, even though it was pulled through the back of the baseball cap and held with a Scunci… it was very long, hanging down to her backside (hidden, dammit, in the oversized jeans). Again, I felt the contradictory mental images of her clashing, in this case several images: H in make-up and glamorous Hollywood clothes (like Jennifer Garner); H in generic business casual clothes (the librarian before she lets down her hair and takes off her jacket that hides her curves); H in glasses, a white blouse, and short skirt, hair flying wildly (sexy librarian post-revelation); and H as I saw her before me, in dirty grungy baggy work clothes, but with her hair falling down her back.

Trying to reconcile all these images, I nearly rear-ended a Porsche Boxster S. While driving a county car.

Damn.

A shifting perspective is a wonderful thing to experience. Even if nothing comes of it, I’m going to remember that moment when my consciousness changed how I looked at someone else. I live for those moments; they are as special to me as moments of epiphany are to a spiritual or religious person.

So much of what we see is filtered through our expectations. Change your expectations and you can literally change how you see the world.

In this case, you can learn to see a hidden beauty you had never before noticed. The value of that shift is incalculable.