Eastside Boy.txt

I know many professional writers who say to never share your first drafts, but I am not (yet) a professional writer, and just about every single post here is a first draft, so I’m going to do what I want. While I’m enjoying XOXO Fest 2024, here’s the first two pages of the first draft of my unpublished political comedy. Reading it now I know there are many things I would change but I have changed and the world has changed since I wrote this in (checks notes) holy shit 2012. Enjoy.

I do not know where to begin. Day two, here I come.

Are you wondering why this is day one? What happens on day two? All in good time, my friend. All in good time.

If you’d asked me a year ago what the least exciting thing I could think of doing, it would probably not have been watching election returns. But that would have been close. And yet, here I was.

The thing is – they were my election returns. People all across the Third Congressional District of Oregon (basically south east Portland) were voting for me, Alex Thomas Ford.

Or not voting for me. The bastards.

Even early in the morning on election day, in a state where vote by mail has been the law for years and years, so that most people voted early with all of the advantages that provided those who counted the votes… I had not made a strong showing yet. My supporters, my volunteers and managers and canvassers and groupies, they were all happy and partying and drinking and whooping it up whenever the blow dried haircuts on the teevee would say my name and post my results. Did they not see how poorly we were doing? And by we, I meant me.

Maybe they weren’t voting for me for a reason. OK. They had their reasons. Lots of them. I was pretty much a dark horse candidate, running an unconventional campaign against a popular incumbent. I had… what was the phrase the consultant had used?

I had… unique attributes. Considerations. Details that might be considered in a poor light by some voters.

I raised my head from the bar and took at look at the bartender. She wore a deep red corset, a cigarette dangling from her black-lipsticked lips, framed by her gothic black dyed hair. The miniskirt she wore didn’t hide much, either.

Turning around on my stool, I looked across the smoke-filled club. Normally decorated in black and red, now hung with red, white, and blue bunting and banners bearing my name. So out of place. A contradiction in context. The people filling the main bar area were people normally dressed in jeans and t-shirts but some of them, for tonight, had bought their first-ever suits. They were as out of place in their jackets and slacks as the patriotic decorations were in this smoky dive in the deep east side.

And at the far end of the bar, up on the stage, kicking and spinning on a pole, a petite brunette was taking off her silky lacy underthings and exposing her pale white skin while my supporters tossed dollar bills (and larger) on the stage, and cheered. Her name was Sheila. Sheila Morris, though she danced under the name of Knife, as evidenced by the tattoos of long hunting knives that adorned each forearm.

She was my campaign manager.

Those dollars were campaign contributions. Don’t look at me like that. I had to account for every single one to the Federal Election Commission, or pay heavy fines. I said it was an unconventional campaign. I did not say it was an illegal or corrupt one. I ran a tight ship, and Sheila had an amazing head for promotion and finances. It had been a skill that had not been easily learned. She had had to earn my trust the hard way, and now I trusted her implicitly. I might even love her.

But that was the elephant in the room, about which we did not speak. Not yet. Not while we were running for Congress.

Shadowtail’s Song, Act 2

Start with Act 1 here. In my D&D campaign, I surprised my players with this knowledge by introducing a cat by the name of Shadowtail. This is Shadowtail’s origin story, Act 2.

I was inspired by several things: cats I’ve known in my life, for one; the stories about Lankhmar Below by Fritz Lieber; the novel Tailchaser’s Song by Tad Williams; and the Dream of A Thousand Cats from the Sandman series.

Act II:

She did not have a name. She had lived so long among the Two-Legs that she had nearly lost her meow, which surprised me. Whatever the Two-Legs called her did not sing to her, so she ignored them. She had spied me from a distance and it had reminded her of something, and eventually had approached me.

She was as free as the wind, and as patient as the stone, and as fierce as a fire. But what she was all else: she was clever. Nearly as clever as I am.

We spent most of our time aboveground. Riverwild would come find me and we would hunt together or sun together in the late afternoon. On rainy days we would hide in one of the buildings – avoiding the stone hall near the gate where the Two-Legs came and went, and the main temple where the fount of magic once was. We would hiss and taunt the giant spiders in the pavilion, or chase game down the stone steps into the deep hole, or chase each other along the broken wall tops. 

Best of all we would watch the sun, moon and stars chase themselves across the sky from the top most level of the tallest tower, and we would sing to them, and to each other.

One day, we had wandered beyond the walls in search of tasty mice, and seeing her on the bank of a rushing stream, I said that she was as wild as a rushing river. She sneezed in laughter, and said, “You, and only you, may call me Riverwild. I may not come when you call, of course, but my heart will hear it, Shadowtail.”

Eventually, kittens happened, as they often do.

Riverwild and I would roam and hunt still. We were particularly careful about avoiding the gatehouse during these long warm days andshort warm nights. When Riverwild became too gravid to hunt, she would nest in the long grass near a pool of potable water, and I would bring her meat to feed her and her — our — kits. When they were done with nursing, Riverwild and I would give them prey to play with, and sometimes hide and pounce on them, until they learned to hide and pounce on us. We gave names to the one or two who could sing more than just cat-song.

It was a good summer. But the warm season does grow cooler. Leaves turn from green to brown and orange. Days grow shorter, leaving more night in which to hunt. Kittens became ptoms and qweins. They grew and some stayed nearby, and others wandered off on their own adventures. In the lazy afternoons, bellies full, I would sing them songs of Kopno’domas Below and the War of Cats, Dogs, and Rats (hissss!)

Shadowtail’s Song, Act 1

When designing a world, whether for fiction, or a table top role-playing game, the best advice I’ve ever received was “put the things you love in your world.” Because of that, in my D&D campaign, I’ve decided that many rats, some cats, and a few dogs can speak. They’re otherwise ordinary examples of their kind; no other special abilities or extra hit points, no opposable thumbs, they can just talk. They don’t like to talk around the Two-Legs, and they’re in constant war with each other.

I was inspired by several things: cats I’ve known in my life, for one; the stories about Lankhmar Below by Fritz Lieber; the novel Tailchaser’s Song by Tad Williams; and the Dream of A Thousand Cats from the Sandman series.

I surprised my players with this knowledge by introducing a cat by the name of Shadowtail. This is Shadowtail’s origin story.

Act I:

It’s true; some cats can speak with lesser creatures, like dogs, or rats <hissss> or even Two-Legs. Not all of us, though. And some of us don’t like to let the Two-Legs know. They can’t all be trusted.

I’ve always known how, as far back as my kittenhood. My mama Sunrise, and my papa Stonegray, both knew how, and they taught me. I was better than my brothers and sisters, I knew that much. Don’t tell them that I loved them. I did, but they wouldn’t believe me. That was a long time and a far journey away, in Kopno’domas Below, the city beneath the city. We hunted and rested, and avoided the Two-Legs above, for the most part.

My family and the rest of the colony didn’t only play and hunt and sleep, though. We were at war, always at war, with the dogs, and the rats <hissssss>. I hate the rats the most. Dogs are just dumb but many of them are bigger than even the biggest cat, and can be dangerous sometimes, in large numbers.

A few years back, the Rat Queen and Her Court <hissssss!> had somehow gained the upper hand on our little colony of cats. They greatly outnumbered us, and had enlisted help from among the Two-Legs, and were coming to eat us all. It was the smart thing to do to leave. We had no ties to Kopno’domas Below. Pfft. It didn’t hurt us at all, leaving the only home we had ever known, full of warm soft places to sleep and many tasty things to hunt. Surely anywhere would have those things, right?

So we left, my brothers and sisters and I, and Sunrise, and Stonegray. One night, we crept out above ground, made our way past the Two-Legs with big knives in metal shells, and we kept traveling in the direction of the setting sun. We found plenty of things to hunt, though some of them were large and better avoided than chased. We found fields full of grain, and kept going. We found tall mountains full of dangerous things, and kept going. We smelled salt in the air, and living fish, and followed the streams to the biggest area of sand, jutting up against a bigger than big pool of water, from where the scent of salt and fish came from. Mama and papa said that surely this was the hunting ground we had dreamed of for many of our lives. 

Sunrise and Stonegray called this a beach, and The Ocean, and when the sun fell into The Ocean it all lit up like it was on fire. It was a good life. We didn’t have comfortable cushions to rest on, and there were no small fires to sleep next to, and there were no Two-Legs around to leave out tasty treats to eat. We had to find those comforts ourselves. And we mostly did.

As we roamed we found smaller towns full of Two-Legs, and over time, some of my brothers and sisters wandered into them. I worried (don’t tell them) but I also hoped for them. Not all Two-Legs are bad.

Sunrise and Stonegray also felt the call of sleeping on windowsills and silk pillows to rest on after a good hunt, and one day they butted my head, told me I was special, and wandered into the town. I was torn, but I also knew I was not fit for these kinds of comforts, as special as I was. So I kept wandering, keeping The Ocean and the setting sun to my right as I continued down the coast, hunting and sleeping as I wished. Mice were plentiful and clever, but I was cleverer. 

One evening from atop a bluff, I saw a big wooden boat out on the ocean waves. It had wine-red sails that caught the wind and pulled it over the water. From the beach, I kept up with it as best as I could, until the boat pulled into a cove, and it lowered a smaller boat, full of Two-Legs. They had found a Two-Legs ruin, walled off, abandoned. It was a large area, with a dead tree in the center, and many towers and buildings. Some of them stayed above in tents with a fire, the others disappeared into one of the buildings. This was not a town or a village. I could keep my distance from them, so I stayed for several nights, hiding in the bushes. I stole bits of food and cheese from them but kept out of their awareness. I slept near the dead tree, where they did not go.

One night, I woke, whether from luck or alertness, to see another cat, pale with ginger stripes, and blue eyes, watching me. “Hello,” she said, in the common Two-Legs language.

A Change Would Do You Good

Since I mentioned Azak and Tuud, my beloved kobold NPCs, in yesterday’s post, here’s a little short story I wrote about them. It was meant to provide my players some context after the fact. I love these two so much. Hope you enjoy them, too.

The two kobolds crept through the cave, keeping low. They turned their eyes in all directions, spotting the burnt out torches stuck in the ground, the campfire with inedible burnt meat, and the passage down.

“What do you see, Tuud?” asked the pale white kobold.

Tuud pulled the bronze rimmed goggles over his eyes. His red-scaled face scanned the cave. “Eh. Same thing I see with my regular eyes, Azak. Are you sure this is where we have to go?”

“Dorgach ordered me here. This is where our clanmembers went with the big lizardfolk.”

Tuud shook his head. “The demon. Don’t say its name.” Tuud shivered. “Saw the bodies of our clansfolk outside. Slaughtered.” 

Azak waved Tuud to come along, walking toward the side passage nearly covered with vines and roots. “Foot prints, boot prints specifically. Big people came this way.” Azak stopped, grabbing their midsection, their muzzle wrinkled with a grimace of sudden pain.

“How are you doing?” Tuud was immediately by his friend’s side, an arm around their shoulders.

Azak leaned into the hug, then shrugged it off. “I will be OK. The change will be over before we know it.”

“Change comes on dragon’s wings,” Tuud intoned. “Must be difficult. Many males have been lost–“

“Killed. Murdered.” Azak corrected him. The cave floor under their feet gave way to a black and white ceramic tile floor.

“As you say. So before the clan can grow, we need more males.” Tuud tapped his temple. “I know this, but you’re my first friend I’ve known who actually had to change, female to male.” He rested his hand on a black stone archway carved with bird shapes.

Azak scowled. “Does it make a difference?”

“No. You’re my friend.” Tuud shrugged. “Makes no difference to me. Makes no difference to the clan. Just don’t like to see you hurt.”

They had advanced down the hallway, and down some stairs, to a room with a wide stone pool in the center, filled with oddly clean and clear water. Four bronze, or maybe gold, statues of humans in feather-like armor were in each corner. A passageway led onward on the other side of the pool. 

Tuud made toward the pool to look inside; he saw some vials of bright green resting in the bottom, along with a scattering of coins. He shot a glance at his friend. Azak shook their head, though, and began searching the far doorway for signs of a trap. They poked at a slack tripwire, pointed out a scythe blade that hung, having been sprung before they’d arrived. 

“Further. It’s safe. Let’s go.”

They scampered down another set of stairs and around a corner. They entered a larger room, lined with old and broken pillars to the left and right. At the far end, a black statue, at least three kobolds tall, of a grim looking Human in feathered armor. In front of the statue was a crude platform, a slab of stone on top of piles of other stones, with several burnt-out torches around it. A pile of bodily remains were piled on top, dried blood staining the slab and foundations.

Tuud did not like the look of any of this and hesitated at the entrance. He noted more foot prints, scuffed, on the tile floor that indicated a fight. “Or a dance,” Tuud said, laughing.

Azak made a beeline toward a pile of burnt and blackened rubble against the left hand wall. They began poking around and found another body. A lizardfolk, dressed in silvered robes, had been stabbed many times, the torso almost obliterated. “What monster did this?” Azak hissed. Azak kept digging through the rubble, turning the body over. “It has to be here, it has to be! Help me!”

Tuud came over, helping to shift the debris around. “What are we looking for?”

“The staff! The staff! That is what Dorgach sent us to find.” Azak sat down, defeated, their head in their hands. “It’s not here.”

“Then we must make a new one.” A raspy voice intoned from the shadows. Tuud startled and spotted a thin humanoid shape with creepy proportions barely visible in the far corner, near where an empty cage sat.

Azak stood up and defiantly shouted. “Not from Tuud!”

Tuud startled again. “What?”

The humanoid shape sighed, then laughed. “Fine. Fine. Your friend can keep his skull. If not a fresh one, then we will need several.” A long midnight-blue arm extended from the shadow, and a long finger extended from the hand. “Start with the previous shaman’s skull, then collect the ones of your other clansfolk, and all of their arm and leg bones.”

Tuud waited but his friend pulled out a dagger and began cutting away at the lizardfolk’s robes. Tuud sighed and unsheathed his own knife.

“Azak, what is this for?” Tuud whispered to his friend “Why are we desecrating the shaman?”

“Because,” Azak said, tiredly. They wrapped scraps of the silver robes around their arms and torso. “I’m the new shaman. Lord Orcus demands it.”

In the shadows, Dorgach laughed, raucously, its deep voice booming through the fallen tomb.

Unable to Breathe – Daily Story Project #27

Still working on Smoke, Part 2. Not ready yet. So a new, short one tonight.

He woke up, on top of the covers in his bed, his chest being pounded from the inside by his heart. It took him several moments to realize that; he felt a discontinuity. On the one hand, he was obviously motionless and still, having just seconds ago been asleep. On the other hand, his back and legs ached, and his heart rate was dangerously near his aerobic maximum, his lungs burning and he, gasping for air, as if he’d just run a race. He couldn’t put the two facts together. One or the other was incorrect, a mistake. And yet there they were.

He felt the constant artificial wind from the fan, placed at just the correct angle to blow across his body but not directly in his face. His eyes took in the light, yellowed by the curtain but still nearly full daylight. He rolled over, away from the fan, and squinted at the digitally-reproduced time on the bedside table: 8:49 PM. While he watched the numbers morphed into 8:50 PM, then 8:51 PM. He was fascinated by the rate of change. It seemed tied to his heart rate and breathing somehow.

Maybe the fan tricked me into thinking I’m moving really fast, he thought. Yeah, that’s probably it. My subconscious mind, active while my conscious mind slept, took in the daylight through my eyelids, and combined with the air rushing past, decided that I was falling.

He was always doing this, rationalizing away what was normally inexplicable to him. He couldn’t help it. No one could deal with facts that completely contradict the ebb and flow of life and remain sane. Of course, making up stories about why a live salmon was flopping on a sidewalk, miles from a river, or telling oneself that a fan could produce such a huge oxygen deficit that would rival what was produced during an hour-long workout… that stretches the definition of sane, doesn’t it?

More than anything he was bored. Bored of his life, bored of the people in it, bored of the day to day grind of work and rest and eating and shitting and all of it. He welcomed fear and panic; at least that was something out of the ordinary.

Which side of the bed do I get out of? he asked himself. He always tried to enter and leave the bed by a different route every day. He had pushed his bed into the exact middle of the bedroom in order to have all four sides available for his entrance and exit. In the few moments it took him to decide, the clock cycled through another eleven minutes. He scrambled out the foot of the bed. He hadn’t gone out that way in a long time.

The blank walls of his room screamed at him. A small pile of clothing, clean, made an island in the boring brown carpet between his bed and the closet. A small pile of clothing, dirty, made a peninsula against the corner of his bed, extending out into the boring bedroom towards the door. He stepped over these, pulled a pair of shorts and a t-shirt from the top shelf of the closet and put them on.

Gordon was bored. Dangerously bored. His breathing slowly decelerated towards average, his heart beats spaced themselves out, incrementally, until he was no longer aware of them. He’d returned to balance.

He hated this feeling. He was especially annoyed this time, since he had a half-baked idea for why he woke up feeling like that, one he found difficult to swallow. He was mad at himself for letting himself down like that.

Why did I wake up? What was I doing going to sleep that early, anyway? What am I going to do now that I’m awake?

He found his phone and slipped it into his pocket. He searched the mountain of debris on the coffee table in the living room (LIVING room? Ha. He hardly lived in there at all) and mined out his key, which joined his phone in a pocket. He slipped into a pair of sandals.

Outside. Had to get outside.

In the brief time he’d been awake, the summer sun had set and darkness had oozed over the world. In spite of himself he shivered when he stumbled out into the cold night air. It felt wintry, chilly, on the exposed skin of his arms and legs, his face, after the subtle heat of his bedroom.

Smoke, Part 1 – Daily Story Project #26

This story idea started small but as I wrote it got bigger. I’ve actually been working on it all week. It will be at least two parts, maybe three. So I’m stretching it out, rather than hurrying to finish it. Gotta listen to my muse.

His voice had never sounded so cold before. That was my first clue. Not that we had a close relationship. He ordered the drinks, I served them. But he’d been coming in on a regular basis for a couple of weeks now, every couple of nights.

Alone, which wasn’t unusual for a customer in a titty bar. Particularly a male one.

“May I get a Seven and Seven?” he asked. He did not lean on the bar, his hands were at his side, and he did not lean down to look under the hanging glasses and mugs that obscured vision of me behind the bar, in spite of his height.

“Sure,” I said, and I started putting his drink together. While I poured, I nodded towards him. “Welcome back.”

“Oh. Thank you.” His hand went up abruptly, then stopped, then went towards his back pocket to pull out his wallet, which looked shiny and brand new. For that matter, he was dressed in what appeared to be a completely new outfit, head to toe: a simple gray trilby with a red silk hat band, dark colored button shirt still starched and creased from the package, a dark gray wool vest, loose fit black jeans held with an uncreased leather belt, and long-pointed toe shoes.

“You’ve made a good impression, man.” I said. With a flourish I spun a cocktail napkin onto the bar, then set the drink on top and slid it across to him. A little hippy-hippy shake is good for tips. “I’m Leo.” I held out my hand. He ignored it, dropping three twenties on the bar and sliding his drink closer.

“Some ones, please.”

“Right.” OK, then. I made change for him, accepted his tip (he gave me $1.50 on a $6.50 drink) and promptly forgot about him.

Business was steady but not spectacular, but enough to keep me moving for a while. It was still early, just around 9 PM when the dancers had a shift change; the four swing shift girls leaving as they danced their last sets, the six closing shift dancers straggling in, dragging their bags of makeup, dancing wear, shoes and who knows what else in, or having the bouncers drag them in for them, disappearing up the stairs behind the bar in street clothes, descending in lingerie or bikinis, made up to the nines.

By the time the final pair of night shift girls took their respective stages, the stream of customers to the bar, and the constant pop of waitresses trading orders for drinks, had slowed a bit, and I was able to look around the room and catch my breath. I really wanted a smoke, too. “Hey, watch the bar for a minute,” I asked Cecelia, the main stage waitress.

“Ugh,” she said, because she’s an ex-smoker, but she flipped up the gate and came back behind the bar. I grabbed a jacket, made sure my cigs were in there, and went out through the kitchen.

It was a bit chilly for early summer. I lit one up and then walked around the building to the front door. I wanted company. There was an awning that was technically 25 feet from the entrance, although the way the building was situated, with the freeway so close, smoke often got blown inside just from the traffic. It was annoying, even to me: I thought of myself as a considerate smoker. I didn’t want to make trouble for people who lacked my addiction.

Under the awning was a picnic table, and in the dim light I could see a tiny person in a long black trenchcoat sitting on top of the table, her face orange from the glow of the cherry on her cigarette. “Hey, Jamie,” I said.

She scowled but softly. “Good thing there’s no custies out here.”

“Oh, right,” I said. “I mean Hey, Saffron.”

“Sapphire,” she corrected me. She had the coat bundled around her pretty tight. She was probably wearing next to nothing under it.

“Did you change it?”

“No, it’s always been Sapphire. Because of my blue eyes.” She fluttered her lashes at me, laughing and taking a drag.

“Gotcha. So what’s happening tonight? Anything good? Too early to tell?”

“It’s dead, but I’ve only been on stage once. There’s a strange one, though. Tall thin guy, dark hair. Giving me the eye.”

“Oh, him. He’s been coming in, couple of times a week, for a couple of weeks. He’s not being too weird, is he?”

“He’s the only one tipping me, and he was tipping a couple of bucks a song. Not weird. But quiet. Respectful.” She got up, stepping down to the ground and dropping her cigarette into the gravel and crushing it with her clear plastic 9″ heels in a smooth motion. “He’s been paying me a lot of attention. Was here last time I worked, too.” She patted my cheek. “You’re cute when you get all big brother-y. He’s cute, too, but in an intense kind of way.”

“Let the guys know if he shows any sign of trouble, Saff,” I said.

She walked away back into the club. The bouncer opened and held the door for her, introducing a blast of music that soared above the passing cars.

I finished my smoke, tossing the butt in the coffee can on the table, and spent a minute picking up other butts and trash, then walked back around the building to the kitchen door.

Like the Cake Song – Daily Story Project #25

A return to the fictional Portland that lives in my head, and is exactly like the real one I’ve lived in almost my entire life.

A taxi pulls up to a ramshackle house in southeast Portland, somewhere between SE Powell and Division, and 39th and 82nd. House, painted gray, maybe decades ago, needing more paint. Boxy shape, flat roof. Garage on the street level and in the front. Stairs leading up to the door on the second story, with a front porch formed by the roof of the garage. Garage door open, and filled with tools and left over construction supplies and sawhorses and gardening supplies and everything else but a car or two. A single light bulb in a fixture meant for two bulbs shone down on the sidewalk, but very little light came from inside the house. Late at night, after the Oregon Liquor Control Commission’s mandated 2:30 AM cutoff time for selling liquor, after hours.

The taxi disgorges a slim black-clad figure and a person-sized black canvas box. The figure hands cash to the driver inside, and the taxi pulls away, taking its yellowness away from the black and gray of the neighborhood, taking the engine rumbling and soft hiss of tires against asphalt with it, too, leaving only a distant sound of the highway. And a dog, barking. There’s always a dog barking somewhere.

Jennifer trudged across the sidewalk, under the light, up the stairs, pulling a wheeled suitcase behind her. She smelled of cigarette smoke and creme rinse, just like the heroine of the CAKE song called “Jolene”, even though she didn’t smoke, herself. She wore a black hoodie over blue jeans, but in the suitcase were vinyl pants and leather boots and silken corsets and lingerie, along with hair-care products and makeup, and a textbook or two, and notepads, and CDs, and a wad of money, mostly twenties, that had mostly been given to her a dollar or two at a time and slowly exchanged for larger bills as her evening had progressed.

She was coming home from work at Miss America’s, where she danced and got naked for tips. She was tired, worn out, and pissed off at the nameless faceless men (and women) who had treated her like a prostitute. But she put up with it because she’d made over fifteen hundred dollars, which was a good take for a weeknight.

She unlocked the door (“the thick, breezeway door” she thought, singing the lyrics to the song in her head, though the real door was just a standard front door) and pulled her suitcase in to the front room. She closed the door, quietly, thinking her house mates were all asleep. She left her bag where it was and crossed to the couch. A pile of blankets and pillows obscured the seat, and she started to push it all aside so she could look for the TV remote.

Her hand met something of weight underneath the blankets. Something warm, and solid. “Hey!” shouted the something under the blankets. It rolled over, and sat up.

“Fuck!” Jennifer shouted, then she turned and hit the light switch. “What the fuck?”

The figure on the couch was a skinny brunette girl, like a small scale version of Jennifer. The smaller girl blinked in the sudden light, and held up one arm to block out the light. The arm had a tattoo of a knife down the outside of the forearm, done in blue-black with a bright drop of red blood at the tip. Fake blood, in ink, not real. Cartoonish, even.

“Sheila?” Jennifer asked the smaller girl. “What are you doing here?”

“Shit. I got thrown out.” Sheila fell sideways onto the couch. “I don’t have anywhere else to go. I’m such a fuck up.” She had on a bra and sweats, and her torso had several other tattoos – an Egyptian ankh on her right tit, an orange and red sunburst pattern around her navel, more. She still wore makeup, bright red lipstick, dark eye shadow and eye liner, all of it smeared from her sleep. She hadn’t bothered to remove it before crashing. “I’ve been here since my shift ended. I can’t go back home.”

“Who let you in?” Jennifer scowled, mostly at herself. “I don’t mean it to sound like that. I’m OK with you being here. If you really got thrown out.”

“Meghan said I could crash here. I’m so sorry. It’s been a shitty week.” She rolled over, facing into the couch, as tears started to fill her eyes.

Jennifer pulled the covers over her friend, sat down on top of them. “You need some sleep. We can talk in the morning.”

Sheila sniffled and wiped her eyes. “How are you doing? How’s school and stuff?”

Laughing, Jennifer said, “It’s all good. Professor Yun asked about you a couple of days ago. Wondered why you dropped out. I told her it was… complicated.”

“I couldn’t go back.” She laughed through her tears. “I can’t ever seem to go back anywhere. I was too embarrassed, couldn’t face her after…”

After coming to class one too many times fucked up, Jennifer thought. “She wanted you to know… your paper on reputation-based markets was amazing. She said you may have the nugget of a whole new way of thought. You just need some… discipline.”

“What the fuck ever. I can’t even keep an address for more than a month or two.”

“And I could use some help with my Econ homework, too. I’m just a simple country lawyer. Or, y’know, I will be.”

Sheila rolled over onto her back, looked up at her friend. “Thanks. I can take a look at it in the morning. I kinda enjoyed it. I wish I could stick with it. I’d be the sexiest accountant ever.” She drew the blankets up to her chin and seemed to collapse into herself. “Mostly all I want to do is sleep lately. I barely move when I’m up on the stage.”

“You’re the second person I’ve talked to lately who has no energy. I met this guy last weekend, and he’s so angry all the time… It just drains him, he says.”

“Oh? A cute boy? Does Odd know?”

“Odd knows. Odd knows everything. And this guy just wants to talk politics. I think.”

Sheila sighed, loudly. “That’s another thing I miss about going to school. I miss guys who just want to talk. Nobody seems to want to talk to me anymore.” Her eyes, already red from crying, began filling with tears again, and her lips trembled.

She knew, Jennifer thought, Sheila knew that she was the cause of her own problems.

Neither girl had the courage to say it out loud, though. It was like the elephant in the room about which no one could talk.

An elephant named heroin.

Dragon Doom – Daily Story Project #24

Another tale from my D&D campaign: a tale within a tale within the game.

In the sea-fishing village of Warjos Dos stand two walled compounds, among the huts and homes; the Western Temple of Rhoban the Brewer at one end of town, and the Fortress of Lord Warjos, champion of Rhoban, and protector of the coast, at the other end.

And on a chilly fall evening, Lord Warjos held a feast for some young heroes who had helped to repel an invasion of the town, and who had discovered the murder of Warjos’ friend and former adventuring companion, Ilbahn, and Ilbahn’s family. Willy the Brewer, a round and serious priest with a taste for beer; Maira, a part-elf woman just beginning to learn magic’s trade; Xanril, Willy’s childhood friend, a young man who had helped build Rhoban’s cathedral who was quick with a bow; and Maria’s traveling companion Matla, a giant of a man, one of the Free Folk of the north, wearing skins, uncivilized.

The beer flowed, and the fire burned warm and bright, and servants brought out course after course, and the young heroes were honored and humbled by the generosity of the town’s military leader. But they were also curious, because before Warjos had been a leader, he, too, had been an adventurer like they.

It was Willy, the young acolyte of Rhoban, a native of the town and now on a path for larger things, who, when the servants’ trips had slowed down, and the beer had mellowed everyone’s moods, was bold enough to ask,

“Lord Warjos, the stories of you and your companions most mighty deed are surely known around the world. It’s a tale about which people both low- and high-born can say they are familiar. But still, I would hear it from you directly, if you would do me and my friends the honor. Please, sir: tell us of how you fought, killed, The Dragon?”

Warjos took a deep draught from his mug, and set it down. He stared into the fire pit for a moment. And then, with his rough but commanding voice, he spoke.

“First we had to get a scale and a claw and a tooth of the dragon from her lair. Many lizard folk and kobolds guarded the caverns in which she slept, and a band of cultists dogged our trail, harassing us and seeking to delay us, for what reason we knew not.

“But eventually we made it past the early defenses (a pit of oil that the slightest spark or flame would set off into a raging conflagration) and obtained one each of scale, claw and tooth.

“Then we had to bargain with the elves to help them enchant a weapon to slay it. We had to do several small deeds to win the favor of the elves and their queen, since none of us were of elfin blood. But eventually we began the process of enchanting the weapon.

“The final stages had to be done on the grounds of the old elven fortress, south along the coast. We explored the ruins and found that there was, at one time, underground passages, but they had all been collapsed and impassable. When Anansegr the Elven wizardess began the final ritual, an army of undead skeletons and zombies appeared and attacked her; we fought them long enough to complete the ritual.

“We ended up with a single arrow of power, so potent in magic and attuned to the beast that we were told a single true shot would be enough to kill her in an instant. We protected it from the kobolds and lizard folk in the dragon’s thrall and carried it past the dragons defenses once again

“We ventured back into the mountains, ran afoul of the dwarves there, escaped, and crossed into the dragons domain. We were attacked again by the cultists, and captured one of their number, a woman. Ilbhaan questioned her, trying to find out what the cultists were up to. She struck me as insane, babbling on about how magic was going to doom us all, and how much better off we would be without it. Her words struck deep into Ilbhaan. He spent much time in conversation with her. Eventually, he convinced her to help us slay the dragon. She was eager for its demise, but wary of Ilbhaan’s magic.

“Once again past the dragon’s defenses, deeper, until we found the sleeping chamber of Tountomos.

“She was waiting for us. Somehow, she knew that we had her doom with them.

“She whipped up sorcerous winds to deflect any arrow; we began a holding action to wait out the spell. We took blows that would slay a normal man dead, and kept fighting. Chaisa held strong in her faith and helped the group maintain, but it was taking too long. Finally, Diggy managed to steal a gem from her horde and began climbing out of the cavern, which was enough to enrage her and cause her to chase after him. In the tight tunnel, the winds were no longer a factor, and Warjos was able to take aim and fire.

“I aimed true. The arrow struck.

“Tountomos was dying.

“But before the Wyrm died, she called out Ilbhaan’s name, and called him close. Wary of a trick, he protected himself with what few spells he had left, and walked over. She spoke to him in a corrupted dialect of Draconian and Old Imperial, whispered to him a prophecy, and foretold his doom. Then, only then, did life leave her body, an ancient and powerful force of nature gone from our world, forever.

“My friend was ashen-faced and not from the exhaustion of battle. He was silent on the journey back, not even speaking to Mlanda, the cultist. As he used up his spells, he did not replenish them, until they were all gone.”

Warjos stood, and in a swift movement he raised his mug in a cheer. “To Ilbahn, and to Tountomos. Today, they both reside in the after world. But we… we live on, in a world that much poorer, that much less magic, for their passing.”

Then Lord Warjos simply bid them goodnight and left the Great Hall, leaving the young heroes to their thoughts.

A Beggar’s Tale, Part 1 – Daily Story Project #23

Another story set in my D&D campaign setting, specifically in the central city, known as Kopno’domas, and involving a character who has tangled with my players on occasion. This tale is also incomplete but it’s all I was able to write tonight. More at some later date.

“If it’s alms you need then tell me a tale.”

Palloi sat, eyes forward, and looked. He saw fine leather boots, rising to the knee, above which were green silk breeches. Hanging beside the leg a slender well-smithed short sword, both decorative and functional – and worth dozens of golden coins. The boots, dark almost black, stood in a muddy street. Whatever was above the pants he could not see beyond the edge of his hood. The street was in the slums south of the walled city, and the mud was a result of the showers of rain that were a familiar sight in this, the latter part of the year. Beyond the legs were more legs, tall and short, some not human, all on their way to or from some other place probably as muggy and miserable as this one.

Palloi raised his hand to the hood that shaded his face and pushed back. His dark eyes searched upward; black and yellow fine wool tunic, black leather vest decorated with gold buttons… and a dark, leathery face under a tight green turban with a hawk’s sharp nose.

“What kind of story do you wish to hear, sir?” Palloi stage-whispered at his interrogator. “Happy, sad, adventurous or tragic?”

“All stories are tragic when taken to their final conclusion, boy,” the standing man said. His voice was deep and resonant. “What I want to hear is your story. How came you to this low status? I look at you and see a thin boy covered in dirt and rags, kneeling on a muddy street in a decaying and fallen city long after the splendor of Empire has passed.” He paused and chuckled quietly. “Though that may be going farther back than you’re willing to tell.”

Palloi smiled. “Or farther than I remember, sir. I am just trying to get to the end of the day, same as any gentle creature. I need a few coins to purchase some bread and a bit of wine and to keep the night chill away for another sunrise.” Palloi scanned again his well-dressed audience. Maybe I need more information…?

“What’s your name, good and kind sir? By your dress you are not a native of Kopno’domas, if such a thing exists. You are dressed for warmer, dryer weather – and more civilized folk, if that silver frogsticker is all you need to defend yourself.”

The man nodded to himself. “Very well, you may call me Thyme. Like the spice.” Thyme started to kneel, thought better of it, looked back and forth along the street. “I will buy you a drink and a meal in exchange for an hour of your time.” Palloi smirked and started to decline, but Thyme interrupted him. “I’ve no interest in you in that manner, boy. Truly, simply all I wish is a tale from you.”

Palloi stood and gathered the small bag stuffed with his meagre possessions. “There’s a tavern just a street over. Megasia’s place, wonderful cider or stout ale. Do you know of it?”

Thyme waved Palloi ahead. The boy led his new employer across the street, past a gate into a small alley, where they emerged on a smaller street with only a few ragged folk in sight. Turning left past a long-dry fountain they came to a wide spot where several other streets and alleys converged. Palloi entered a door under a tiled sign showing a woman’s graceful form and a fat stout bird – The Dancer and Grouse.

The common room was large and wide. A fire pit in the middle was putting out heat and flames, even on this warm muggy day, but the cross breezes from the unshuttered windows along the walls made it comfortable, rather than oppressive. In the fire pit there were sausages being cooked, and a whole goat, and two large kettles of stew, along with some late summer corn on the cob. A dozen tables were on the floor on all sides of the pit, and along the left-hand (or north) wall was a long oak bar – the only nice piece of furniture in the room, the rest being simple unremarkable wooden chairs and tables.

Palloi led Thyme to a table along the wall, near a window but not in direct line of sight of it, and sat facing the rest of the room. “Oh, forgive me,” he said, “I should have waited for you!” Despite his apologetic tone, he did not get up or move at all.

Thyme pulled out a chair and sat. His eyes narrowed and he scanned left and right, and shifted nervously, but did not object.

The boy caught the eye of the woman behind the bar and called her over. The two men looked at each other, silent, the younger man smiling, the older one scowling.

“Magasia, my lady, some corn, some sausage, and two mulled ciders, please.” The lady, a round red-faced woman of past child-bearing age, dressed in a purple velvet robe, waited patiently while Thyme counted out some coins and laid them in her palm, then went back to collect their order.

“No bread? You mentioned bread,” Thyme said pleasantly if impatiently.

“Bread actually upsets my guts,” Palloi said. “But feel free to try it! I’m sure Maga could use the money.”

Silence again fell while the woman set down two plates and two copper mugs full of spiced warm drink, along with a fork and a small bowl of melted butter. “Anything else you need, ask,” she grunted and walked back to her perch behind the bar.

As soon as the food was in front of him, Palloi began picking at it and stuffing morsels in his mouth. The corn, still on the cob, was warm and sweet and yellow; the sausage was black on the outside and grey on the inside, and greasy even in the wan light from the nearby window. Palloi ate steadily, but quietly and with little drama. His elbows were tucked in, his head down, and he wasted no food by spilling or dropping it.

Thyme picked at his sausage but ate little. He watched the boy for a moment, then cleared his throat. The boy’s dark brown eyes flicked up, he stopped in mid-bite.

“Yes, sir?”

Thyme’s eyes smoldered.

“Aha. Yes. A story.” Palloi wiped his chin with his arm, took a quick swig of his spiced cider, and then leaned back in his chair. Where to begin?

“This sausage is mostly goat,” he started. “Grown on a farm between the Mage’s hilltop castle and the flowing great river. I’ve been there. The farmer is the younger sister of Maga, and is lovely to look at in spite of being in such a low profession. Maybe it’s all the hard work of raising goats and growing corn and keeping all the farm hands in line that keeps her in such fine shape,” and here Palloi used his hands to outline the shape he spoke of,”and many of her neighbors take time from their busy farming schedules to go chat with her and, discreetly, take in the view of the farmer. Her name is Chalakosi, or Chala, and she is fair and young despite her years.

And she grows the tenderest goats in the entire Vale, and the sweetest corn, and the tartest – most tart? – apples. As you can plainly attest to, good sir. And the best of the best get brought here, to the Dancer and Grouse. The rest, and there’s not much, get sold to the highest bidder, and that, generally, is Lord Captain Grenjolm. Or should I say, was sold to Lord Captain Grenjolm, because that man has been missing for nearly a year.

–––––

I hope I’m not jumping ahead in my story, or revealing something out of turn [Palloi continued] but I’m reasonably sure that Grenjolm is my father, and I’d like to think that Chala is my mother, although she denies it if I’m so gauche as to ask her directly. “A boy as sweet and as quiet as you are surely sprang straight out of a corn field, fathered by the Fay and placed there by the Eld” she’d say. But I don’t have pointed ears and my shadow doesn’t move of its own volition, and my blood spills red and I have no mind for magic, so I’m pretty sure I’m human. But who knows?

Be that as it may, I don’t have much of a connection to them as parents. I was raised at a temple in the Djurwalk neighborhood, sweeping the floors and polishing the statues and avoiding the holy men and women. I had a warm bed and a roof over my head and not a moment of freedom at all in which to enjoy myself. And when Uraga Bo, the highest priest of all, decided one day to castrate me to see if I’d sing pretty, I ran away and found a nice warm pile of hay in the alley behind this tavern because the food smelled familiar. It smelled familiar, I found out later, because Chala and Grenjolm were penitents at that temple; they’d stop there every few weeks, fresh from the farm, each of them separately and never together, and they were always kind to me. Sometimes as much as a few silver coins kind, sometimes only a taste of sausage or a handful of corn or a fresh sweet slice of apple kind.

It seems obvious in retrospect, doesn’t it?

Well, ol’ Maga tried to scare me off the morning she found me sleeping under her window. But her heart wasn’t in it, and I talked her into letting me stay and clean dishes and reset the tables after a rowdy evening’s crowd. That was nearly three years ago. This is as close to home as I’ve ever felt. I’ve visited Chala’s farm, and even though it can smell delicious, it’s not home. I prefer the alleys and streets. And that’s how I came to be here.

–––––

Thyme shifted in his seat. “That’s almost too pat,” he said. “You’re clearly improvising. I wager there’s no Chala and no Grenjolm and no temple of diddling priests and priestesses. But it’s mildly entertaining and it killed the time, so you’re welcome to your sausage and corn and cider.” Thyme pushed his plate across the wooden table. “And you’re welcome to mine, as well.” He stood up and turned.

Then turned back, a golden coin with an ornate eye embossed on it, unlike the locally-made golden dragons and suns. “Will you take me up on the wager?”

Palloi paused, mid-bite. He had returned his attention to the food (he was very hungry after all) when it looked like his companion was going to leave, but this surprised him. He was cynical enough not to take any offense at being called a liar, but cautious enough not to leap at the small fortune being dangled in front of him now. “Wager? About… Grenjolm and Chala?”

“Aye. You said Grenjolm disappeared. Is this Chala still around? Could you introduce me? Or at least prove she exists outside of your fevered imaginings?” The coin slipped between the older man’s fingers, flashing in the pale light. “This and, say, 9 more like it are yours if you do.”

Warden – Daily Story Project #22

Don’t hate me if this seems incomplete. Road trips often do. Man, I am jonesing for a road trip these days. Who’s with me?

Gerald felt the pressures of life lift from him as soon as he climbed in behind the wheel. Perhaps he was running away, but really, what in his life was there to run away from? His last date had been nearly two years ago, and he had made a clean break with his job. Gerald had few close attachments in his life; he had never bought a house, despite having made good money right out of college. He’d never seemed to stay with a girlfriend for more than a couple of months; after a while, they just drifted apart. Even in his hobbies, Gerald was a dilettante, moving from interest to interest. Jack of all trades, master of none… that was the motto of Gerald’s life.

He had decided to get out and see America while he was still young and nieve enough to enjoy it. He had felt stifled in his job, and one night while browsing Powell’s Books for something interesting to read, he’d noticed all the interesting travel literature that had been written. Kerouac’s “On The Road”, Persig’s “Zen And The Art of Motorcycle Maintenance”, Steinbeck’s “Travels With Charley”, Least Heat Moon’s “Blue Highways”. All those titles had jumped out at him, a uniquely American literary genre. Road Books. He’d bought them all, but had returned them the next day: why read about it, when he could do it?

Gerald had given his two week’s notice at work, given a month’s notice to his landlord, and put all his money into a decent car, and a lottery ticket. It had taken him about two weeks to find the perfect car: a 1967 Ford Thunderbird convertible. Black, with a white interior, completely restored. A Classic American Automobile.

The closer he had gotten to fulfilling his dream, the happier and more animated he had become. The boy who grew up in Portland, Oregon, would finally see the world.

And so he had done it.

*****

The stars flickered brightly over the moving passenger train, and Warden Kelly caught it all, lying on the grassy hill a few yards from the tracks. Behind him ran the highway, US 101, the Pacific Coast Highway. Warden waited, and watched. In the morning, he knew, the car would come, and Warden Kelly would deliver his message.

With a patience almost superhuman in capacity, Warden waited for morning.

*****

Gerald had secretly hoped that the lottery ticket would have won. But it didn’t (as most lottery tickets don’t) and so he had had to follow through without the comfort of having a million dollars in the bank. He’d blown his savings on the car (classic automobiles don’t run cheap), and now had exactly $358.92 in his checking account. He was going to see America.

He’d spent the week selling off his worldly possessions, then moving the rest into storage (just his bed and some momentoes and odds and ends he couldn’t sell). He’d donated the bulk of that money to charity, to build up some good karma. He’d decided to first head towards the Pacific Ocean. That way he could later claim truthfully to have gone from “coast-to-coast”. He drove out of Portland on the Sunset Highway straight from his last day at work. His few close coworkers had bid him goodbye, each with a wistful look in their eye and some excuse about why they couldn’t (or wouldn’t) do what he was planning on doing.

Gerald felt like the last of the pioneers, and was more than frustrated that no one seemed to feel the restlessness that he felt. It was so easy! he thought. Possessions are just… things; it was easy to give them up. The teevee and stereo, the nice apartment, what comfort could they bring. Gerald knew that he needed something more than that, some adventure to stir his spirit. And he felt sad that others either didn’t seem to need that same thing, or were so caught up in chasing material possessions that they ignored that need.

Was Gerald so different from everybody else?

The drive to the coast was peaceful. Two hours later, just as the sun was setting, he reached the ocean. He stopped in Seaside and watched the sun define the horizon in brilliant pinks, blues, and reds. Getting gasoline, the attendant remarked on Gerald’s car. Gerald made small talk with the man, an older man who seemed distant when Gerald tried to shift the conversation to other topics. Gerald’s sense of isolation deepened.

He stayed the night in a small motel, and went to sleep with the sound of the waves crashing into the beach.

In the morning he headed south, towards Lincoln City. The highway swung away from the ocean for a while, and then later that morning swung back. He hadn’t been to the coast in, what, three or four years ago? It was just as he remembered it four years ago when he was unexpectedly interrupted. Shortly before 11 am, he noticed three things in rapid succession; a train track paralleling the highway, a Southern Pacific freight train running along the tracks, and a man standing in the middle of the highway.

Gerald stomped the brakes, then pulled over to the side of the highway. The man had been waving his arms and shouting something; perhaps there was trouble. Gerald rolled down his window. There was little traffic, odd considering it was a summer weekend, but one car did go by. The man ignored it and turned towards Gerald’s car, covering the distance in an easy lope. The man was dressed in faded jeans and a blue cotton sweater; with the sun coming up, Gerald thought, the man was going to be warm.

The wind made off with the man’s words. Gerald shouted at the man to speak up. As the man got closer, Gerald could make out the man’s words.

“Red hue. One day this will make sense to you.”

Gerald was cold all of a sudden. He quickly rolled up his window, put the car back in gear and rushed back on to the highway, nearly cutting off a VW Bug in his hurry to depart. What was that all about? Gerald hadn’t counted on the inexplicable on his new adventure.

*****

Warden Kelly smiled to himself. He was not an evil man. He had simply had a message to deliver, and he had delivered his message. He could rest for now. Until the next step was required of him.

*****

Gerald drove straight down the coast, passing through Lincoln City, then Newport. He was spooked by the oddity of the man giving him a cryptic message. What did it mean? It was almost as if the man had been waiting there for Gerald. The words rattled around in his mind: Red hue. One day this will make sense to you. Red hue. One day….

This day, the first day of his grand tour of America, was a glorious day. The sky, rarely this blue; the sun, rarely this warm. Traffic picked up as Gerald neared other Oregon tourist spots; campers and minivans filled with families and their accouterments crowded the lanes, swerving into and out of McDonalds and motel parking lots. Gerald’s car got lots of stares and honks from passers-by, and Gerald had to admit it was a great conversation piece, for a brief moment or two of human contact. His thoughts of not being tied to any material possessions were gone for the moment, forgotten in his need for being noticed.

Gerald stopped for lunch in a little restaurant that overlooked the ocean, and had a bowl of clam chowder. He could see many boats out on the sea, fishing boats and trawlers, pleasure craft. Little boats on the sea… all having a safe harbor to sail into at the end of the day.

“Want a refill on that Coke, hon?” The waitress gave him an anticipatory look, one hand on his empty glass. She seemed frozen in mid-gesture, awaiting Gerald’s response before moving again.

“Uh, yeah, yes please. This chowder is excellent! My compliments to the chef.”

She moved again, no longer a mannequin. “Oh, yeah, he gets that all the time.” She took the glass and headed back towards the soda fountain.

Gerald looked down into his bowl, and tried to arrange the chunks of clam into a smiley face, but he’d eaten too much of it. When the waitress returned, he smiled and asked, “Is the traffic going to be this heavy further south?”

“Yeah, it’s the tourist season, all right. I hear ya.” She moved off to a nearby table; a family of four had just sat down. “Hello!” the waitress said brightly “enjoying the warm weather? I’ll be right back with menus for you!”

Gerald paid his bill, leaving exactly a 15% tip, and drove off. He was headed inland. He’d seen enough of the coast.