A story of three hands, sort of

I’m three days away from hitting a streak of 150 days in a row posting at least 500 words here. It’s been a great run. Well, great for reminding me that I can, if I put my mind to it, build up a habit of writing and posting daily. I’m proud of showing up and keeping it going, even at times when I’ve been busy with other things. No reposts of material that has already appeared here, everything original and never-before published on the open web. So on the one hand, it’s been good for my writerly instincts, building that habit, that rhythm, of tapping out something on a regular cadence.

On the other hand, I am not proud of every single post. Without going back and doing a personal audit I couldn’t give specific examples but I know that there are some, maybe even many, that do not make me feel joy for sharing it beyond incrementing the number of consecutive posts. That is not a great feeling. Many published authors have given the piece of advice that writers should not share their first drafts. First drafts are meant to just be a foundation for expansion of the good bits, deletion of the bad bits, sharpening the text and prose, sculpting a better text.

On the third hand, some of those posts that start out with me saying “I have no idea what I want to write about,” turned into something cool. By just starting, I was able to pull out an idea or a feeling that was lurking inside, hiding away from my conscious brain, unlocked by the magic of showing up. The ideas flow and something coalesces. It’s raw, unfocused, but there’s something good there. It just needs another draft, or some editing, to be great.

When I’m posting every day, though, I don’t often have the time to do that editing. I’m writing, as I am now, with just a few hours until midnight, my mental cutoff for “today”. I click “Publish” as soon as I finish writing it, in the heat of creation. I have been taking the time to do some quick software-enabled grammar and edit checks, but it’s not the same as taking an hour or two to reflect on what I’ve written, consider the overall message and how I develop my narrative and argument (if the post supports it), and look at the post with an editor’s eye instead of a writer with a deadline.

My blog now includes posts that are not as strong, as focused, as beautiful as they could be, because I didn’t give them time and attention and polish. There are other posts that probably are just typing exercises and shouldn’t be posted at all; these don’t even have a kernel that could be expanded and enhanced, it’s just a ramble without direction. Good for my typing speed and building a habit but little else.

I want to be better. I want every post here to be something I’m proud to publish, proud to share. What I’m saying is that I am shifting my goals. Instead of posting every day, my plan is to keep on writing every day. I need to keep that habit going because the intentionality of writing daily means it becomes more difficult to stop.

But I am not going to post everything I write. I think I will still make it a goal to post something here, but on the days when my writing isn’t a sparkling diamond from the first draft, what I’ll post is a link, or some inspiration, or maybe some pictures. I’ll mention how many words I wrote that day, perhaps, maybe comment on what I’m working on. My friend Tracy has challenged me to try to quantify how often I post, or come up with some measurable metric for it. Tracy, I will try to come up with a way to measure it but for now, I’m just going to say, I will only post the things I’m proud to share, whatever that may be. It’s an internal measurement of worth and I don’t know how to quantify that. Not yet.

I still have to hit 150 days in a row, though, before I’ll allow my goal to change. And I have several ideas for posts to reach that goal, don’t you worry. I’m still going, and this blog isn’t going anywhere. Blogging is back and I’m here to stay. Thank you for joining me.